The Best Possible Outcome

Whenever we are working on something, we are working toward ‘the best possible outcome’. What the best possible outcome actually is, depends on the project at hand — and very often on our definition of success. If our definition of success involves a monetary perspective, chances are that in our ‘best possible outcome’ money is involved. On the other hand, if our definition of success has more to do with following our heart’s desires, what we envision as the ‘best possible outcome’ may not have a monetary aspect at all.

From a spiritual, or even universal perspective the ‘best possible outcome’ more often than not has to do with our personal growth. With the lessons learned. With experiences we have as we move forward along our personal paths.

As such, the spiritual perspective on the ‘best possible outcome’ may be vastly different from what we have dreamed up in our own conscious, logical minds as the ‘best possible outcome’. After all, we really love to have happy endings...

But what if your personal path takes you into serious illness? From our human perspective that is about the worst that could happen to us. However, from a personal-growth perspective it may well be an experience that will allow us to move forward on our paths with leaps and bounds!

It seems that perhaps the biggest difference between our logical perspective and the personal-growth perspective are our emotions. As opposed to the spiritual world, our emotions allow us to learn our lessons in the earth plane. From the spiritual perspective we are cheered on with every step we take on our personal path of growth — whether that involves pain and suffering, or winning the multi-million dollar lottery.

That being said, the energy of this point in time does allow us more than ever before to adapt and change our ways mid-stream. And as soon as we figure out how to bring our logical perspective and the spiritual, personal-growth perspective on ‘the best possible outcome’ together — our rewards can be greater than we ever dreamed possible!

And this seems to include financial and health issues just as well as smaller, or more subtle, ‘best possible outcomes’.

It does require for us to be courageous enough to be willing to look at all the aspects of what is happening in our lives. The good, the bad, and the ugly. All without judging ourselves because of it.

Just observing what is at play, how we feel about it, what it has to tell us, and what we feel we are learning from it.

The ultimate outcome may still not be what we feel is a good or desired outcome, let alone what we perceive as the ‘best possible outcome’. Yet chances are it has permitted us to learn and experience invaluable lessons on our path of personal growth.

First published March 8, 2013

Unexpected Change of Circumstances

It is funny how the circumstances we may find ourselves in can either give us a jumpstart, or stop us in our tracks. We tend to look at a change in our circumstances as a negative. Something that is throwing off our routine; that takes away the structure in our lives — in other words, something that makes our lives harder than it needs to be, as it takes away the organization we have imposed on our lives. It stops the plans we have made in their tracks, and suddenly we need to adapt to a place — and energy— that we are not that familiar with. 

This seems quite obvious with the big events in life — like relationships (whether they start or end; they do change the circumstances), moving house (for whatever the reason), losing or finding a job… All of those things change our circumstances to such extend that we are forced to adapt.

While there are also much smaller things we can find on our path, that change our circumstances in such a way that they become ‘life altering events’. With the recent pandemic as another major circumstance that can affect our lives and cause us to change direction on our individual life paths, is our health. Or more precisely, our perception of our health and wellbeing.

Suddenly it seems like we have become much more aware of how fragile our health and wellbeing are — or can be. Where only a couple of years ago we may have thought that being healthy was our “normal” state of being, now it is almost like we have to take overate action to maintain that level of wellbeing that we are comfortable with.

Just living a healthy life — with healthy food, enough sleep, and plenty of exercise — no longer seems to get us the same results it always did…

It amounts to an unexpected change in circumstances that demands us to look at the way we live our lives differently.

On one hand we may find that the stress we have always experienced as a “normal” part of life can have a greater impact on our sense of wellbeing than it ever did before. But then again, this greater awareness of our (perceived) physical fragility may also allow for physical anomalies to come to the surface unexpectedly.

It can be as simple as twisting an ankle because we stepped on a loose tile on the sidewalk, or as complex as an illness we find ourselves dealing with out of the blue.

These type of unexpected circumstances ask for a drastic reduction of whatever stress we are experiencing in our lives. On top of that it becomes extremely important to prioritize — to determine what is most important to us as we are living our lives, rather than to continuously adapt to (what we perhaps are thinking) other people around us are expecting of us.

And when we take back our ability to make our ow decisions, walk our own path, and live our own lives in a way that makes us happy — we may well find that our sense of wellbeing grows, as well as the perception that we are stronger — healthier — than we think we are.

Expressing Ourselves

Perhaps one of the more dramatic changes in energy at this point in time is found in the way we are expressing ourselves. We may have grown up with the understanding that the way we should express ourselves was “task-oriented”, and seen from a perspective of things that had to be done in order to move forward in our lives. Yet in this point in time this is shifting to expressing who we are. In other words, the way we express ourselves is shifting from “what we should do”, into an expressing of the individual uniqueness that we are.

While this doesn’t mean that we quit our jobs, or any drastic measures such as that, it does mean that it is becoming increasingly more important to pay attention to the unique energy, perspectives, or actions we have to offer to the world — on our own terms.

It requires that, as an individual, we embark on a journey of discovery.

We may have a fairly good idea as to who we are and what we have to offer to the world around us, yet chances are that there is still a lot left to be discovered — perhaps not in the least about how we can productively express the distinctive qualities that make us uniquely who we are.

At first, this may seem to be somewhat of a detour on our paths. After all, things are working well the way they always have, right?

On the other hand, if ever we have had that little whisper in the back of our minds that what we would really like to do is … … … — usually something that we may not feel is productive, useful, or even feasible — this is the time to explore what it would take to at least satisfy your curiosity… We may even find that expressing this newly discovered side of ourselves turns out to be highly productive, extremely satisfying, and therefore an activity that brings great fulfillment into our lives.

Whether this leads to a totally different way we do our jobs — or even a different job — and things that just need to be done, or just something that we keep doing “on the side” is not as important as is seems at first glance. 

The fact that we move along with the shift in energy of this point in time is the important thing. 

Expressing the unique qualities that make us who we are more and more has a tendency to make us feel better about ourselves and our lives. And it places us in a position where it becomes ever easier to make the changes that may have been lingering — perhaps because we didn’t exactly know how to go about it…

So, as we express our unique selves more and more, chances are we become happier, healthier, relaxed, and more productive people…

Vacation

Whether we go on a long trip, or only have a brief sojourn - all vacations have one thing in common… we step away from our day to day activities in order to have some fun, to take a rest, and in a way to recharge ourselves.

Yet the word in itself has a lot to say about what vacation is all about, It seems to have a lot to do with the verb ‘to vacate’ - meaning to leave or to make empty.

The question then becomes what we are leaving behind; what are we making ourselves empty of.

When you see some spring break video’s on YouTube, it seems that in some instances what some vacationers leave behind is their good old common sense...

Something else most leave behind while vacationing is our day to day schedules - the times we wake up, the routine to get to work, coming home, doing chores. All those things we leave behind as they are part of our ‘regular lives’ rather than our vacation.

And finally, the thing every vacationer really really wants to leave behind, or even vacate themselves from, is stress. At least the stress that is associated with our busy day to day lives, as research suggests that vacation in itself can be a source of stress all its own.

In a sense, looking at the word vacation form its most literal perspective, taking some time to ‘vacate ourselves’ from those things that burden us is a good thing. It allows us to take a step back, to see what is really happening in our lives, to decide what is truly important to us. And then, what we take back from vacation is the knowing of exactly that: what is and what isn’t important to us. Coming home to our regular lives we then have a choice to act upon that knowledge.

Another benefit from stepping out of our every day environments in order to vacate ourselves - to release the things we no longer need - is that this in and of itself not only relieves us from our burdens, it also creates a new space. And this space, all new and clear, provides us with openings to start doing new things. To explore new avenues. Embark upon new adventures - not just during our vacations, but perhaps especially in our day to day lives...

And it is these new avenues and adventures that can bring a sparkle into our lives even long after we came home from our vacation…

First published 6/8/2013

A new life

What if your life — the way you have always lived it — stopped? Nothing as dramatic as passing over; not even as traumatic as losing your job or home... But just the realization that the things you have always been doing are not gaining the same result anymore — and that this change has come suddenly...

Would you jump at the chance to reinvent your life; to reinvent yourself?

Or would you keep trying to make it work the way it has always worked before?

It seems that this is the very question many people find themselves faced with at this point in time. 

It may have started with a couple of little things. Things that all of a sudden can fluster you where before they would have never upset you at all. Or the realization that just watching the news on TV can absolutely leave you drained of all energy. Perhaps even a sense that friends you have known for a long time just don’t understand you anymore...

When you feel like this is happening in your life, it is probably time to take a break — to take a moment to evaluate whether these are just isolated incidents, or if this change is also going on inside of you; in your energy. To see if maybe you are too busy. If you are taking time to take care of yourself instead of just making everybody around you happy. To explore what your priorities truly are at this point in time.

In all likelihood something like this happens to us several times in our lifetime. Those moments that come up and present us with the opportunity to change directions; to change our lives; to change ourselves...

As such, these are special moments. 

Upsetting, yes — but also very precious.

Each of these occasions brings with it the possibility of creating a new life for ourselves; a new energy — inside and out. 

The difficulty is that when a situation like that knocks on our door — we hardly ever have any idea as to what we want to do different. Where we want to change directions. How we want to turn out in our new energy; our new life.

It is hard to take positive, productive steps if you have no clue where you want them to lead you. And yet, it is often the only thing you can do; to take it step by step, and having the faith that each of these steps will bring you to the new life — which on some level you have been yearning for, for some time...

First published  1/31/2013

Breathing

We all do it — breathing… And most of us don’t even give it a second thought. It just happens. We breathe in and we breathe out. And when there is something exciting happening, we may hold your breath for a couple of moments. To then release it when we decide everything is okay, and we are safe.

Breathing in… and breathing out.

Have you ever thought about what is happening as you are breathing? Apart from staying alive? But apart from oxygenating the body, a lot more is going on…

As we are breathing in, we are expanding our space. And in doing so, we are giving ourselves the opportunity to permit new information, new experiences, or even new energy to enter our space. Having breathed in, we then evaluate the new experience or energy. We decide if that, that we have permitted to enter on our breath, is actually beneficial or useful to us. If it inspires us. If it has the potential to make our life experience richer…

And as we breathe out, we release everything we have decided is not going to bring us forward on our path. Whether that is that new experience that is not living up to its promise, or if it is old information, or energy we no longer need. Like stress, for instance. Having breathed out, then, we are from some perspective a clean slate, and ready to do the same process all over again…

Can we really do this in just the time it takes us to breathe in and to breathe out?

Well, the answer is yes! Even when we are not conscious of this process with every breath we take (which is a good thing, by the way), this is truly what we are doing as we are breathing.

As we are becoming more aware of this process, we may find that in the world today the emphasis is placed upon the in-breath. On the expansion. On the assimilation of new energy and new things. And while there is nothing wrong with that, it may lead us in direction where we have a sense of fullness that doesn’t light up. Often even a feeling of being stressed about all the things that are coming our way.

When that happens, it is time to breathe out… To let go of everything that, while it may be interesting, is not helping us on our path through life. To let go of diversions, but also of patterns that were once useful to us, yet have no longer a purpose in our lives.

When observing our breathing from this perspective, there is a huge value in breathing out… In letting go… In relieving ourselves from the burdens we no longer need to carry.

So whenever life is “getting to you” a little bit, take a moment to consciously breathe it all out…

Why we do the things we do

There are any number of reasons why we do the things we do. Some are better than others, yet most may not be the best reason to do anything at all — and that in itself should be food for thought...

So here are seven reasons that come to mind:

1. It’s our job.
2. It is expected of us.
3. It is what we need to do to gain approval from others.
4. It is what we are told/taught to do.
5. It is what we want to do.
6. It is what makes us happy.
7. It is what we are passionate about.

And while each and every one of those reasons may come up on their own, they can also dovetail into one another, and as such become stronger reasons to do the things we do…

On the surface there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with the first reason — ‘It’s our job’. Having a job is a good thing, especially if you like your job. It is a way to provide for yourself and your family — a way to ‘pay the bills’. Yet what if it is not a paying job, but more a ‘self-appointed’ job? A chore that no-one is willing to help out with, because it is “our job”? Then suddenly this reason connects with reasons 2, 3 and 4 — and the question arises: “Is this really true? Is it truly my job?”

The second reason is even less clear-cut. Is what we do expected from us by ourselves or by others? Or are we just thinking others are expecting it from us? In all likelihood, even if others are not expecting it from us, they won’t protest if we do the things that someone would need to do anyway…

Numbers 3 and 4 are often intertwined. As long as we are doing what we are told or taught to do, we will gain the approval of others — be it parents, teachers, or bosses… And while it may be a good thing to do the things we do in the way we were taught how to do them, that probably shouldn’t be why we do them. Approval ratings usually are highly overrated where it is about the everyday things in our lives…

The last three reasons turn out to be more sustainable reasons.

When we do the things we want to do in life, we very often find ourselves in a state of contentment, of happiness, or even a peaceful state of mind. (Unless of course we want to do those things because we think it is expected of us to do those things.) When we are doing the things we truly and honestly want to do, chances are they will make us happy!

Ultimately, the very best reason to do the things we do is when we are passionate about them. When they inspire us.

When we identify the things we are passionate about, and put in the time and effort to actually doing them — chances are we got it made!!